Tuesday, February 20, 2007

what if.

Tuesday, February 20, 2007
What if it's all happening for a reason?

What if the hopeless romantic in me hasn't died yet... and it's starting to grow again?

If that's the case, then I'm going to get hurt. again. And it's probably going to hurt more than ever.

For the first time since I found out he got into an (pretty bad but thank GOD not fatal) accident, I cried last night. And I cried today, after work. I was watching Grey's Anatomy (from last week)... and one character posed a question that has hit me all too often: "If I suddenly went missing or disappeared... would anyone notice?"

No, I'm not just looking for attention. I just got really, really emotional... and YES, I know it's not good for me... I know I need to suck it up and go back to being strong...

But I made a mistake. Or rather, I made a decision to change my lifestyle... again. I decided to step out of denial and fall back in love with someone who doesn't love me back.

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